To me, spring means time for cleaning, transformations, and rejuvenation. This spring is no exception- never have I felt more of a need to re-think my bedroom. I think it's important to refresh the decor of rooms, especially bedrooms so that they continue to cater to your needs, desires, and style. Even though it took me quite a while to find my old quilt, I knew that it was time for a change and a focus on naturals- I went directly to my Pinterest board, "Coastal Hamptons Chic" for inspiration. I felt especially inspired by the images above, so I've been looking for similar pieces to develop a zen bedroom space with an emphasis on natural colors and accents. I especially love accents that remind me of my beachy hometown.
Reasons I Have So Much Love For This City...
Everybody is unique, everybody has a journey specific to their own life that tells a fascinating story.
There is reason behind everything in life, despite the circumstance being positive or negative. People come and go in our lives for reasons, we have impulses and follow them without understanding the logic for reasons, we have certain experiences for reasons.
When I review my own life through a certain lens, there are many chapters and sub-chapters that prompt me to ask, "Why?".
Why did my parents have to get divorced? Why did my ex decide to start dating another woman? Why did I not give that project my all?
When I review my life through that lens, though, there are other instances that assure me it was all meant to be just the way it happened. For instance, last November I decided to go to my boyfriend's (now ex) home which was an hour away from where I lived, and five minutes away from my grandparent's home. We baked holiday gingerbread men cookies and decorated them with sprinkles, silver-coated balls, and icing. We ate, we laughed, we watched tv...we fell asleep.
At approximately 5:30am, I was awoken by my cellphone going off. I sprang up, reached over to the desk where the phone was resting and saw "Aunt Tracy" on the screen.
Immediately, I recognized that something was really wrong. You see, my aunt and I are not close at all- in fact, there is a family riff between her side of the family and my own. We hadn't spoken or seen each other since the Easter prior, so to receive a call at such an uncommon hour had significant meaning.
I fumbled while entering my passcode, and tried my best to use a low-tone voice to answer "hello", so as to not awake my ex. She explained that she had just tried to call my mother, but was unable to reach her. She had some very bad news, she said.
She then told me the words I could never be prepared to hear- "Grandpa just passed away".
There were few details, but nonetheless I knew exactly what I had to do. Of course as soon as I got off the phone my calmness liquidized and the most tears I have ever witnessed streamed down my face. At this moment my boyfriend asked me what happened and I explained...I quickly got dressed and drove to my grandmother's home.
I love both my grandparents as much as I love my own parents- they have been, essentially, my second parents. They helped raise me and helped me through the all-too-common rough waters of my parent's divorce.
When I was standing beside my grandfather at the ER that brisk November morning I began to connect the dots...
Just less than a month prior my grandparents were victims of Hurricane Sandy when their electricity was lost. Since my mother's home was unaffected by the hurricane, it only made sense that we take in my grandparents. I drove up to their condo, helped them pack their things and post-hurricane proofed their refrigerator and freezer.
They spent about a week with my mother and I. Over the course of that week, I was able to serve as the hostess-with-the-mostess by preparing meals for my grandparents, taking them around town and entertaining them.
After living in New York state most of my life, I can say with absolute certainty that most people here and in most areas of our country equate money to happiness and success. The tendency of our country is working to live; we strive to have a high standard of living and will do almost anything it takes to get there.
Members of my family have all worked extremely hard to obtain the lifestyle they desire, though my father is perhaps the best example. For many years he traveled to the city from an area about an hour and a half (without traffic) away because that is where his greatest opportunities to earn money came from. Though he did enjoy his job, he worked himself to the bone and it showed- his commute, round-trip, could take over four hours with the traffic that New York City is notorious for.
I was lucky during my childhood; due to my parent's work ethic I grew up in above-average sized homes, with a pool in the backyard and a boat to spend summer weekends on. I grew up rarely worrying about the cost of things because I knew that something was really important to me my parents would be willing to pay.
Although I lived a great childhood, I am now able to see the effects this unhealthy work-personal life balance on my father. I respect his work ethic and his never-ending need to succeed; however, it's made me realize that if I have to work that hard and during those long hours to achieve the same lifestyle my parents provided me with I don't believe I would be happy. Years have gone by, and finally my father ended up realizing that the long commute and long hours were not worth it- he now works much closer to home, even with a somewhat lower salary and he's okay with that.
I came across this quote months ago, and it has been in my mind since: "say yes, and you'll figure it out afterwards", which are words from Tina Fey.
I know that it isn't quite the New Year yet, and actually it's still a while away, however one of my resolutions for this coming year will be to say "yes" more. I realize that in the last year, I have said "no" more often than I would have liked to and I hope to change that this next year.
There are certain situations that warrant a good, solid "No!", but as Tina Fey says, if you say yes, you'll figure it out afterwards.
"Life is what happens to you while you are busy making other plans" (John Lennon)
Time flies- it really does! I am always perplexed when I stop what I am doing and think about what has happened in the last day, the last week, the last couple months, the last couple years...it's incredible.
I find that I am always craving that hustle-and-bustle life, but when I am not hustling-and-bustling I can appreciate how so many things can happen in such
A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval (Mark Twain)
Self-Ap.prov.al (noun): approval or appreciation of oneselfIt's a struggle every young adult faces: the struggle between being [seen as] a child and being [seen as] an adult. This main struggle comes with many other obstacles: figuring out who we are as individuals, figuring out our purpose(s), identifying our personal style.
I have struggled with this for years- I suppose it began in elementary school, around fourth grade. For the first time in my life, I had to make decisions like when my mother took me shopping, would I ask her to take me to stores like Abercrombie, or to stores like Bloomingdales? Would I conform to the way everyone else was dressing (super-tight jeans, camisoles that were lacy and totally inappropriate to be wearing in elementary school, etc.)
The answer I knew: I was much more Ralph Lauren and Lily Pulitzer than ripped jeans and super-mini mini-skirts. But that doesn't mean I was without the struggle for years.
Though I'm now twice the age I was then, I face obstacles of a similar nature- graduating from college in a couple months is a huge contributor to this. Do I approve of the choices I've made recently- like leaving a well-known university and generous scholarship behind after health issues, only to spend a couple semesters at a community college and then move on to a fashion school?
Slowly, I am accepting this.
Slowly, I am approving of this choice I made.
Do I approve of my choice to take a semester off from college to be with my family more? Yes, yes I do now that I know the weekends I spent driving an hour to see my grandparents would be the last weekends I spent with my grandfather before he passed on.
Do I approve of the choice I made when I left opportunities at PR firms behind because I just wasn't feeling the passion for it? Yes, yes I do now that I know how important it is to feel passion for what you are doing.
There are many choices I've made recently that I am not yet at ease with. And yet why, if I made these decisions myself, do I struggle with them?
It's the "what-if" factor, as I call it. What if I didn't do that, or what if I did this? The truth though, is that there are some questions we will never have the answers to. If we take one path, we will inevitably miss other paths. There is comfort to be found in this, because I am now learning that as a member of the twenty-first century it is acceptable to change your own path. It is acceptable to change your own path, but in doing so I believe it is important to first accept and approve of the choices made in the past.